Tribewanted: Vorovoro

From day one on the island STOP READING (If possible, continue reading in a Ron Burgandy voice, if you don’t know who Ron is, watch Anchor Man now and then continue reading) I was surrounded by island fads. They came and went, as tribe members… came and went.

At first the tribe was gripped with shells, don’t worry its not some horrible disease (unless you can’t throw four’s or eight’s). Where the aim of the game was to be the first person to score 100. Sometimes this could take a matter of minutes, other times you were happy not to be on zero when the game was over.

Once shells had left the picture, this made way for the utilisation of Tonoa Park (The Tropical Home of English Football). This lead to epic football matches on the island, none more so than the match after the champions league final, where all the lads were in the mood, the match seemed endless even though both teams had plenty of chances to end it. The bath after the game made it all worth while though. After the changing of the guard match which pitted the exiting Exeter boys against the new Birmingham lads, with other thrown in to both teams, Tonoa Park didn’t see as much action for a good week.

With the football season apparently over, the attention was turned to the Volleyball court. On a sadder note however, this once great game was tainted with the introduction of oreo’s. Players would transfer mid-game if the price was right. Although the price never made double figures, i feel the sport may never recover. On a positive note, the tree house/stand/commentary box took the on court banter to a higher level, now the supporters could shouting, “Spike it” and “TOO MUCH GUN” at their favourite players.

In my last few days two very different sports took center stage, both endurance related, one stationary and the other anything but. I am of course speaking about Holla Hooping and speed four peaks. Holla Hooping was the last fad the I took part in, moments before my “Isa Lei”. This was a battle of wills. ALICE v SAM. At first this was watched by most, but as we went on, attentions were lost and it was just the two of us left willing the their holla to drop. Alice sadly moved her hand and forced her own holla to the ground. I have no doubt there will be a re-match.

As far as the four peaks were concerned, the record was set by Giles at 42 minutes. Before i even had the chance to break it, he destroyed his own time, with a 34:50. My final time was just under 45, AJ and I being the men that we are for some reason decided to do it at high-tide (MAN POINTS: ALWAYS HIGH TIDE). On the plus side this means that when i got back to the island i will have something to beat. In fairness to Giles his time was in the heat of the day. This could mean a sub 30 is round the corner, or may have even already been done.

In the above paragraph there was a refference to Man-Points, and its activities like this that lead to serious man points on the island. Something that was started on the pontoon on my second from last day, not that i am making excuses for my own low man points. Man points are gained, for doing “man stuff”, anchorman quotes, cutting wood, four peaks high-speed, always asking for high tide, working out etc.

Not everything is sports related and after a few campfires, Mafia became the game of choice. This was aided by Paul’s excellent MC-ing and ingenious ways of killing townsfolk. However, three games later it was gone.

Six degrees of Kevin Bacon, pitted AJ’s knowledge of the movie world linking any actor to Kevin in under 6 moves. This game ran dry once it was realised that in the vast majority of cases it was easily done by AJ. Great pleasure was taken by most when it was worked out that our very own play director (alongside Susie), Gemma had 5 degrees of seperation with Kevin Bacon. This means anyone that took part in Vorovoro “finest ever play”, are six degrees of seperation, from Kevin Bacon.

Disney Songs to front stage after Kevin had been link to pretty much anyone could think of. The tribe, normally late at night, or on the four peaks walk or pretty much anywhere they choose would be singing the greats of Disney and other musicals. The beginning of Hakuna Matata was a personal favourite. An unexpected but fantastic addition to the singing sessions was, THE CAKEMASTER. He ate a lot of cake. (You know who you are.)

Disney was then replaced by guitars, the Lewis-Zack play off never happened, both took it in turns to entertain the masses with their songs. However both these young guitarist were both living in the shadow of “Frankie and Albert” by the ever amazing Ben. A song that would always come out to welcome new arrivals in much the same way that “Isa Lei” helped say goodbye.

In the last week or so, however we all bathed in the fountain that was Ron Burgundy Quotes, and when it was done correctly, and in context, it made you feel like a god walking amongst mere mortals (Note: That line was from the opening credits if you were wondering). This was greatly aided by a fireside viewing of the movie and also the introduction Charlotte to the tribe who could out quote the best of us. It scored her major man points. Note: Girls, struggling communicating with men? Talk to them in a language they can understand – talk to them as Ron.

Once the hammock society started to be selective and member (such as myself included) were thrown out for “un-hammock like behaviour”, other societies sprang up around the island. These included the chicken society, the girls secret society (not so secret any more!), pontoon, pizza, meke and of course the biggest one of all, the Pig Society. The Pig Society also went under the names of Pork Patrol, Sausage Squad, Bacon Brigade, the list goes on. There was infighting from the start, its members couldn’t decide whether they were for or against the killing of the pigs and once that was decided the next big question was sausage or bacon. This question was answered with the obvious answer, sausage wrapped in bacon. Remember when it comes to animals, “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.” – If you hadnt work out already, George Orwell’s Animal Farm was a cornerstone for the Bacon Brigade.

Some island fads changed with the weather, on my first morning, after the rain during the night, I was able to get up and enjoy a waterfall shower. As the sun remained (for the most part,) for the remainder of my time, the shower dried up. Naked Sunday was also hit by the weather, both the Sundays I was there the sun did not have it’s hat on, and didn’t look like it wanted to come out to play. Being a guy this didn’t mess with my strict tanning regime of walking around without a shirt on, any day i remembered.

Outlandish statements were also a big factor of the my time on the island, from myself and others. With the agreement of taking equal blame for messing up, Adam and I both said we would bring Pizza to the island on my final Sunday. And we (with lots and lots and lots and lots of help) did. My hair went after my first week, it was surplus to requirement anyway. Gemma and Susie also had a lot to do once they said they would put together a play in under two days. Bravo Girls.

While some fads came and went, there were a few things that simply never changed, the question, “Do you have a lighter?”, the joys of Meke’s (MEKE LOVE NOT WAR) and the relief in the air after a long round of Kava when the chief called “DONDO”

Thanks one and all for making my time on Vorovoro so special. It was the people as much as the Island that made my experience so <insert vorovoro my time justice adjective does here to enough that on>.

You stay classy Vorovoro!